Update on TMB - part 1.

[vwdaun@yahoo.com (Daun Yeagley)]

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I got this off of the VWoT list, but it was soo damn
amusing I had to share.  Part two is to follow.

Seems as though Jay is enjoying the job at the wreckers
while in England 'eh?


Note: forwarded message attached.


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Date: Fri, 2 May 2003 12:13:19 -0700 (PDT)
From: tmb <the_questionist@yahoo.com>
Subject: [VWoT] i have the world's best job (long)
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right, last night, i stayed late at work to take
some measurements for my new muffler, and to see
what's going on underneath the car.

at about 7 o'clock, we (my buddy clive and i)
decide to call it a night and start bringing all
of the valuable cars onto the premises.  the
beaters stay outside (couple of mk2 polos, dusted
audi 80, etc).  

the back lot looks a lot like an oval track, only
that it is about 200m in length.  we each had to
drive a car in, and you can imagine what's going
thru our heads.  so, clive gets into the red
polo, and i get into the green one.

dunno if i told you guys about the green one
before, but it was used a few weeks ago in a
heavy burn out event that lasted about 20
minutes.  nose-to-nose burnouts, high speed
ebrake slides into curbs, etc.

anyways, i get into this green demon (that seems
to get stronger the more it gets beaten on), and
we both take off in a cloud of tire smoke.  clive
in front, we start into the first turn,
red-lining the engine in first.  he pitches the
car right, and applies liberal amounts of upward
motion to the ebrake handle.  the assend of the
little polo slides gracefully out and hangs for
the whole turn.  my turn now, and i do the same. 
not too bad for a guy who is used to using his
right hand to do ebrake pulls.

fast forward about 10 laps, and we're becoming
more and more brazen with our slides, getting
ever closer to the outside 4" high curb marking
the boundry between concrete and grass.

by this point, clive is only slightly ahead of
me, and seeing his car go sideways only 10 feet
in front of me is a real rush.  i could see his
smile perfectly, even tho he was looking straight
aehead of himself.

clive calls it a day, and parks his car.  i keep
going with it, and at the far corner, i nail the
brake again, only my right hand slips momentarily
from the steering wheel, and i find myself
careening towards the aforementioned curb at
about 20mph.  

WHAM!

i get a little air under the front right, and i
am momentarily blinded by my own cheeks crushing
my eyes shut with a big ol' shit-eating grin.

i kept it up for one more lap before parking the
polo.  the friggin thing didn't even lose any air
from the tire!!

fast forward to tonight.  

i'm on the opposite side of the property now, far
away from the "track", but i can hear the scream
of a couple of 1.3L engines giving their all.

i sprint up to the front, and my boss is there
talking with one of my colleagues.  he kind of
says "what are those two up to now?", but sees
the intent on my face and in my run, and quickly
takes up pursuit.

we run to the track and see both clive and chris
doing laps in those glorious polos.  clive is in
the red one again, and chris is kicking it in the
green.

myself, my boss (karl), alex, kevin, and steve
are all watching as they lap faster and faster. 
clive stops and karl gets in the passenger seat. 
chris keeps going, and gets the bright idea to
just leave the ebrake on for the duration of the
lap, rather than applying just before the turns. 
this is actually very enjoyable, as you need to
constantly need to steer the car, even in the
straights.  

i don't like doing this, because although the
first set of turns are nice and open, the third
and fourth have a big ol' tow truck in the way,
and we don't want to wreck it.

chris figgered the way around without getting all
tangled up with the towtruck, tho, so by about
his 4th lap, he'd flat-spotted the rear tires to
the cords.  brilliant!

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