Hopping MAD... sorta (longish)

[malventano at gmail.com (Al Malventano)]

UGH,

Those of you that have spoken to Dave Winchell might have heard a story or two about the SC police department and their 'methods' of
raking in money for the county.  It seems I now have one of those stories.

I'm in Pensacola, FL attending one of those 'tell you and I'd have to kill you' computer networking courses.  Today was the first
actual day of the course, after 2 prior days full of confusion and more confusion on how to get everything rolling properly.  The
course itself is at a smaller detachment a few miles North of the main base:

<http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&hl=en&geocode=&time=&date=&ttype=&q=Pensacola,+FL&ie=UTF8&ll=30.401973,-87.289209&spn=0.01947,0.029
955&t=h&z=15&om=1>

(btw, in case its not obvious from the pic, it started life as an air strip back in WWII, which means the *entire base* is an
autocross track just waiting for cones to be placed :)  More info:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corry_Station_Naval_Technical_Training_Center

There was no room on this small base to supply me with temp quarters, so they gave me a spot at the NAS, which means I've got a few
miles of 'main strip' to travel each morning.  It's no big deal, only a few stop lights, and mild to no traffic.  "An enjoyable
drive actually".  My prior statement is _exactly_ what was going through my mind as a cop flung around and lit 'em up behind me this
morning on the way in.

Now the speed limits may be low around here, but I do actually follow them, especially in small towns like this.  Everything was
good.  For once I was prepared to legitimately say "what seems to be the problem, officer".  Heck, this may even be another one of
those 'what kind of car is this', or 'I had one of these in high school' moments (yes, its happened before, and yes, some were
police officers)...

The guy walks right past the driver side, not even making eye contact, and takes a look at my front end (which is currently
spoilerless as I refinished it and need to repaint it later on):

http://scirocco.dhs.org/vw/pics/0-allyn/rieger/images/041008-104225-Z25.jpg

Comes back to my window and proceeds to go on a Rosco P. Coltrane style tirade about how my car has no front bumper.  Now mind you
I'm in uniform, becoming late for my first day of class, and doing everything possible to maintain my composure, while at the same
time attempting to funnel into this mans head that the missing 'bumper' is actually a fiberglass cover piece that serves no purpose
towards safety / lighting / other, and is purely there for aesthetics.  The 'bumper' is *right there*, in the form of that blunt
steel beam that is staring him right in the face.  Sure it may look mad-maxish, but the fact remains that I *DO* in fact have a
bumper installed on my car.  It may not be pretty, but there is no denying its presence.

After a few very politically worded statements, I eventually succeeded with "so you're going to give me a ticket for a missing
plastic part"?  Even still, he gave me a warning and kept going on about some hoopla about original manufacturer equipment.  Keep in
mind we're in FL for crying out loud, where within 100 yeards of me there is likely to be a truck riding 0.05" off the ground with 3
pieces of scrap metal holding the bed together - as it was gutted to fit #3000 of hydraulic gear.  All of this being aside from the
fact that I know of no law requiring the front bumper of my car to be covered.

So I know it wasn't as bad as Daves stories (costing him real money where I just got a warning), but it's the principle of the thing
that pisses me off.  That and I am not prepared to reinstall the front spoiler as of yet (need more prep and paint, which is not
happening until I am prepared to do the whole car).  Being at a 2 month school that's 6 hours away from home doesn't exactly make it
easy to take care of it either...

I know what I'll do...  when I go home this weekend I'll swap the Rieger-modified euro bumper for a spare boat-anchor USA spec front
bumper.  Then we'll see how that court battle goes if/when the same cop spots me and gives me an actual ticket - for believing that
the only USA-spec part on my car not legal :)

Heres to hoping that is the only 'snafu' that hits me in the upcoming weeks.

Allyn Malventano, ETC(SS), USN
87 Rieger Scirocco GTO 2.0 16v (mad max edition)